School Holidays – My Thoughts
So, tonight is the last night of the two week school holidays. And I thought I would do a little post on my feelings about this.
This has been prompted by some Facebook posts I have seen over the last few years, and then again over the last few weeks. I guess I just need to get some things out of my mind and onto my blog.
Lets backtrack two years. My eldest started school, and as the first lot of holidays approached, I felt this sense of excitement, that I got to spend time with her again. I loved those first school holidays with her home again. Sure, I won’t deny that it was more work for me having her at home again, making it 4 children in my care day in day out, but I loved it all the same. There is something so special about having all my babies together. It’s bonding time!
But as I was feeling this sense of enjoyment, I was also seeing on Facebook, and hearing people talk in person about their dread of school holidays, and the enjoyment they feel when the kids go back to school afterwards. I was questioning if I should be feeling like this too? Was I holding on to my daughter too much? Was I not letting her embrace school life? Was *I* not embracing school life?
Then as I approached this school year, with sending my twins along too, making it 3 of my sweet babies being left in the care of others for so much of their time. I was again faced with these confused feelings. Many friends exclaimed about how much more time I will have, how good it will be having the three of the girls at school, “getting rid of them”, more freedom etc! Yes, I was excited about the change that would come with having my 3 eldest children at school, and looking forward to embracing the new dynamics it would bring to our family, but I wasn’t looking forward to “getting rid of them”, or my “freedom”. I miss my babies when I am not with them!
This first term has been crazy to say the least. We have all had to settle into school life, and this new style and dynamic of a family with 3 children attending school. It’s had it’s ups for sure. Like me being able to do the food shopping with just one child in the trolley and not having to shepherd two others from crashing into everyone else and pulling things off the shelves. It’s also been nice having a little bit more quiet in the house during the days, and not having to referee so much (although the evenings do make up for this). But there have been down times too. Like when Eli is bored and just wants his sisters home to play. Like when one of the girls favourite songs come on in the car and I want to sing along with them but they are not there. Like when we go for a walk and the conversation that flows so freely and innocently doesn’t happen as Eli is not at the same stage yet and only talks about the trucks he sees passing us. Like when I sew something, or find something pretty and the girls join in on that excitement with me. And then when they are finally home with me, they are exhausted and not in a mood to joke and be tickled, they just want to zone out. I miss my girls when they are at school.
Approaching these last school holidays, I saw a few Facebook posts like ones I have seen often in the past. Something along the lines of “Oh boy, school holidays are here, can I slash my wrists now?” Ok, maybe not that extreme, but definitely posts of dread, not excitement. Then with the end of the school holidays, I have been seeing the “Yippee, schools back in 3 sleeps” type posts. It seems that there are many mothers out there that don’t enjoy the holidays like I do. Why is that? Don’t they miss their kids? Their own flesh and blood that they created and have cared for? I don’t understand this.
Look, I am not trying to make out that my kids are awesome to be around 24/7. They certainly are not. They are HARD WORK! And yes, school holidays are very hard. The kids are out of routine, they are in each others faces more which then leads to more fights, which means I am more mentally challenged with the refereeing. Not to mention all the extra hands on work that comes with having them all home, more cooking, more cleaning, more washing, more entertaining.
But HELLO! I signed up to be a Mum. I chose this life. This all comes part and parcel with having the blessing of children. I get to mould them into beautiful little people. I get to be the one they look up to, the one that they learn most of their life skills from. I am the one that gets to spend the most amount of time with them building experiences and memories. How special is that? I hate it when that is taken away from me, that is why I LOVE school holidays.
But, I do have one thing I am looking forward to with school going back. The routine! I LOVE routine and it all falls out the window on holidays, so I am craving that again. I’m off to make the lunches and get the school dresses laid out after this!
Sorry if this post has ruffled some feathers. I guess I just wanted to put it out there how I feel. I want to challenge other Mums to embrace the holidays and enjoy their children instead of dreading them. Your children are a blessing!
How do you feel about all this? I would love to hear your thoughts.
Making Strawberry Jam/Sauce
Today, the kids and I had a go at making jam. It was the first time I ever tried making jam, and was one of the reasons I bought my Thermomix. I heard people raving about how easy it was with a TM, so I just had to try it out.
And yes, I discovered it was quite easy. But unfortunately, we didn’t end up with strawberry jam, we ended up with more of a runny strawberry sauce, great for on top of ice cream!
The problem had nothing to do with the TM, it was completely user error. You see, I bought 1kg of strawberries on special, and then realised I only needed 500g. Didn’t stress, knew that with cutting the tops off the strawberries, I would have less than a kg anyway, and I would just freeze the leftovers to make sorbet later. Well, in my effort to involve the kids in the whole process and have them do as much of the cooking as possible, I forgot to weigh out the strawberries, and ended up putting the whole lot in! Was probably about 750g give or take (the kids chopped the tops off and sometimes took more than I would). So this extra 250g without any extra sugar made it not set so well. We don’t mind though, it’s a lesson learnt and the sauce can still be used anyway. But, we do need to find some other fruits on special to make jam again as I only have about 2 tbsp left of our last lot of jam.
The Girls Room
So today I finally went ahead with an idea I have been thinking of for a while. It involved a furniture move around. Now anyone that knows me, will know that I move round furniture A LOT! And most of the time it’s a spur of the moment decision. This time it wasn’t an impulsive move, it was something that’s thought of long ago, and ummed and ahhed over it until last night when I asked for people’s opinions on Facebook. Most of the responses said go for it, which was my gut feeling too, and then this morning when I asked hubby and he said “I know you will do it regardless of what I say”, I took that as him giving me the approval to do the big move.
The idea was to have all my girls sleeping in the same room. Ashca and Gemma (the twins) were already in the same room and Chloe was in her own room. Ash and Gems room was bigger, so Chloe moved in with them.
It was a BIG job. Not only moving the actual furniture (I am quite accustomed to doing that), but the hidden mess was the worst! Under Chloe’s bed was a nightmare! But the kids ALL pitched in and we worked as a team and did it quite well.
I didn’t actually time it but I think from start to finish it took maybe 1.5 to 2 hours all up. Clearing the space for Chloe’s bed, moving it in, cleaning the old space and moving the clothes in there.
Here are all the kids enjoying the “new girls only, but brothers allowed” room.
The Twins side.
Chloe’s side.
Since our girls are all close in age (21 months), we have kept all their clothes together for a while, and it was all stored in Ash and Gems room as it is the biggest. So when moving Chloe’s bed in there, as much as the clothes would have still fitted as well, I wanted to keep the bedroom fairly minimalistic with just the beds and the book shelf plus a chair. So I put all the clothes in Chloe’s old room, which I guess you could say they have their own little walk in robe/room. Although, I am also using clothes room to store hubby’s golf clubs and soccer bag so he doesn’t keep leaving them near the front door and cluttering up that space. Plus it gives me room to store the bigger sized clothes for the kids, the portacot ready for easy access when we have friends with bubbas over, and also the drum kit is set up in there.
Crappy pics taken after dark. The clothes tubs and hanging rack are overflowing and being culled tomorrow, and the drum kit still needs to be set up properly, but you get the idea.
So, my reasons for doing this mammoth job……
1) I didn’t grow up with siblings close in age. My brothers are 9 and 11 years younger than me, so during childhood we were worlds apart. Since my kids have each other, I want to give them as much sibling connection as I can, and I truly believe that making their haven, their bedroom united, helps bring them closer together. Especially for girls, and especially as they grow older. Many people have voiced opposite opinions to me on this, that the older girls get, the more they need their own space, but I think the dynamics my my girls are different, seeing as they are so close in age. I do kind of feel bad for Eli being left out but he is only 2, and doesn’t seem to care about it. I guess time will tell on that one.
2) Chloe is in grade 2 now and can read quite well. The twins are starting to be able to read snippets. I wanted to give the girls regular reading time in bed each night to encourage this, and it’s easier if it’s all together. I can sit on the chair and listen to them each read their readers, and they can read to each other. Plus it’s easy storage for the books for their ages all together. The board books for Eli are out in the play room. The girls still read those too, but the older books are kept nicely in their room now.
3) Talking and bonding time. Everyone knows girls love to chat. Before this big move, my girls would often be found in either ash and gems room or in chloes room sitting on a bed chatting, it’s just what girls do. I have introduced 10 min talking and reading time at bedtime. They do their before bed routine, get into bed and can read or talk for 10 mins, then after 10 mins it’s kisses Nd cuddles and lights out. Tonight was the first night and it worked well.
4) Only one room to mess up, and only one room to tidy. Our girls are notoriously messy! They can trash anything! I can take all their toys away and they will still make mess. So, by only having one room to mess up, it’s a much easier clean up task for them. They also only have cuddle toys and books to make a mess of now too. Yes they technically still have another room for clothes, but I can assure you that if the clothes are not in the girls main hang out room, they will not be messed up as much! Out of sight, out of mind to play dress ups, or change clothes 20 times a day!
I have other smaller reasons, but these are just the main ones that I can think of right now.
Anyway, just thought I would update about that since I am on a bit of a blogging streak hehe.
Do you have kids who share rooms? Is it out of necessity due to lack of space, or because of other reasons? Do you like it or loathe it?
Today I….
- had my usual porridge for break and LOVED it!
- surfed IG a lot
- text chatted with a good mate lots today, I love text conversations, reply when it suits you
- bought my big girl her soccer boots, shorts and socks for a bargain price of only $60 all up. Good quality stuff too!
- did lots of washing, didn’t put any from yesterday away though as it’s still not dry (the worst bit about cold weather)
- caught up on some blog-surfing, and left some comments for some lovely peeps for the first time in ages!
- had an “I don’t know how to deal with this” parenting moment
- had a big parenting brainstorm chat with hubby, love those chats! Have felt in control again ever since.
- made homemade milo
- baked a weetbix slice
- dusted – I know shock horror!!!
- swept a floor that already needs sweeping again
- washed dishes about 12 times, no exaggeration there!
- took video of Eli washing dishes – so cute! Warning, annoying Mummy voice throughout the video.
Click here to see video of Eli washing dishes
- got sick of people whinging about the fact FB bought IG. Get over it people!
- decided the girls have way too many clothes, which will be culled sometime over the next couple of days when I get all the current washing put away.
- gave the kids dinner at 4:30pm
- took kids to chloe’s soccer practice (after first calming her down from a panic attack about going)
- watched my girl at soccer practice having an awesome time and doing so well, serious proud mummy moment there!
- put new sheets on two beds
- considered the possibility of putting all three girls together in the same bedroom – still need to convince hubby though
- craved ice-cream, so made myself some low point banana and chic chip ice-cream once putting kids to bed
- now sitting down getting ready to get stuck into work for the night!
How has your day been? What did you get up to?
The Goal of Blogging
I have been meaning to write this post all week. It’s been at the back of my mind every day, and then I climb into bed at the end and remember I wanted to blog. Oh well, tomorrow’s job. And well it never happened. So now it’s 11:43pm, and I just finished my work for the night. I decided to give myself a deadline of midnight, and since I finished early I thought I might as well try and get this blog post done, get it off my mind at last.
Now you are probably expecting this is a huge meaningful post, I assure you it’s not exciting, thrilling or anything like that. It’s just my random thoughts as usual haha!
So, last week, I visited a lovely friend of mine. Someone who I find beautiful on the inside and out, inspiring on all levels, and just super lovely. She’s knows who I’m talking about 
While I visited, we got chatting about blogs. Mainly about hers of course, as mine has been well, ignored/non-existent/not chat worthy etc. I was saying how I desperately want to blog, but seriously lack the motivation. I first thought it was about lacking time, but I now know that is not the case as I find time to do other things, and I could definitely find time to blog, it’s the motivation that I’m lacking. Through our conversation, my lovely friend suggested to go back to the root of it all, the goal of blogging. Why do I blog, why do I want to blog in the future, what’s my goal for it all.
That’s a pretty big question, and one I have been stewing over all week. I think I have finally found my answers though.
When I first started blogging, I was blogging for diary purpose. To record our daily lives, and share it with those who care. I think that is still my main goal these days. I want to record what happens in our lives. Not only the big events, but the little seemingly insignificant things too, those things that don’t seem much now, but spark those memory banks in the future. I want to blog my feelings too, not everything of course, but I want to look back and read about how I was feeling during these earlier parenting years. But I also want to share this with those who care. At the start, this was mainly for family and friends. But now, I have realised I have another goal in mind. I want to blog for other like minded mothers. I want to connect with other Mum’s out there in the same boat as me. My hope is to be REAL. To show that parenting, womanhood, wifedom etc is REAL, and has it’s ups and downs. And yes, we can have our own self and interests in amongst all that too whether it be a business, crafting or whatever it may be.
So, now I know my goal, where do I go from here?
Hubby was looking at my blog today, and said to me “You really need to work on your blog again”. I replied with “Yeah I have been thinking about that a lot this week”, to which he asked “What, close it down?”
I instantly replied with a strong “No!”
Well at least I know that for sure, my blog is going no where, I want to keep it, it’s just a matter of figuring out how to give it more attention. It’s also nice to know that hubby cares about my blog being updated.
So, does anyone have any suggestions on getting the motivation to blog again? I feel like I have tried so many different avenues to get the blog mojo back. Photo challenges, blogging easily from my iPad (which kinda frustrated me, I still like blogging from the computer), etc and nothing stuck. Is it just a matter of forcing yourself?
Also, do you have any suggestions for content on this blog? Likes or dislikes with previous posts?
I appreciate any feedback you have
Now, because I really hate blogging without a pic, here is a word cloud hubby made from my blog today (which is why he was on my blog, and noticed it wasn’t updated). I thought it was pretty cool.
P.S. It’s now 12:13am – goodnight!!!
Health slice thermomix recipe
Just thoughts would post a recipe for our latest baked goods addiction.
This was originally a recipe from my mother in law, which she got from a friend. I have now converted it for thermomix use.
Ingredients:
- 160g wheat kernels
- 2 tsp baking powder
- 50g dried dates/apricots
- 160g milk
- 1 egg
- 90g coconut
- 80g pepitas (pumpkin seeds)
- 65g sunflower seeds
- 55g sultanas
- 95g brown sugar
Method:
- Mill wheat in TM bowl for 1 min on speed 9, set aside
- Chop dates/apricots in TM bowl for 5 seconds on speed 7, set aside with flour
- Mix milk and egg together for 5 seconds, speed 7, leave in TM bowl.
- Add all ingredients, mix for approx 1 min on reverse speed 1. You will need to push down the sides about half way through mixing.
- Put the mix into a slice tin, bake in moderate oven for about 20 mins.
This could be easily made without a thermomix by using store bought flour, and chopping the dates your self. Just make sure you mix the egg and milk thoroughly first before adding the dry ingredients.
Please let me know if you try this recipe! This is the first time I have posted a thermomix conversion, and I would love to know how others find it.
Enjoy!
Approaching 30
So, it seems that in just 2 more sleeps, I will be the big three oh! Previously, I have been über fine with this fact. I was actually excited about the fact that I would FINALLY turn 30. The majority of my friends are older than me, so the idea of being over 30 with them was appealing.
But as the birthday has been drawing closer, I have been feeling less excited about it.
Tonight, I am feeling especially low. Probably due to the fact of severe overload and lack of sleep lately. It doesn’t take much for me to feel weary and overloaded these days, and tonight is one of those “it’s all caught up on me” nights.
So, tonight I ignored my massive to do list, and gave myself a hot shower, a really HOT shower! I am not someone who just likes a nice warm shower, but I like it so stinking hot that I have never liked showering with my kids as they need to have it so cold! I get red patches down on my shoulders and the backs of my legs from the hot hot hot water. Yep, call me crazy, but that’s how I shower.
Anyway, while I was showing, I got thinking. I thought about my life, how it has been in he last 30 years, mainly the last few years, what am I happy with, what am I unhappy with, what do I want to do better in the future etc etc.
And I know this sounds really sad and pathetic, but all I could think of was the ways I fail. The ways I can never keep on top of everything. I am never being the mother I have always dreamed to be, I am never the wife I long to be, how my house is never clean enough, I never keep on top of the washing, I am never organised enough with dinner, i am not the thoughtful caring funny friendi so long to be, i judge others too quickly and am not the generous person who loves all no matter what, I can’t sew as much as I would like to, I can’t do business stuff like I want to, my blog is never updated as frequently as I would like it to with the interesting and captivating posts I so wish I could write but end up posting boring crap, my weight loss plan is never on the right track, I don’t look after my pets well enough, my Christian walk is a constant back and forth stumble. This is just the big stuff, the list of small things could go on and on and on.
Isnt that crap?, That all I could think of about my life, is how not good enough I am.
But then, after hopping out of the shower, giving myself a pep talk, telling myself to get over it, and just move on, I realised something more powerful.
Us, as humans, we are NEVER good enough. We will always stumble, always fall, always fail, we are not perfect creatures. My expectations of myself are way too high. And the result of high expectations, is the feeling of unworthiness, of not feeling good enough. This is dangerous ground. Those low feelings can so easily merge into a downward spiral, that’s so difficult to climb out of. I don’t want to go down that slide.
Sure, we need to work on our lives being improved, and getting better at different aspects of our lives, but we also need to make sure our expectations, our goals, are just that smidgen past our comfort zone. Enough to challenge us to strive forward, but not so far as to discourage us and make us lose focus.
So as I approach my 30′s, I have a new focus in mind.
I want to live for a happier life, being less judgemental on myself. I don’t want to be so caught up in the ‘shoulds’ of life, that I lose focus on having fun, and living life to its fullest. I want to strive to better myself, but not let those expectations become too high and out of my reach completely. I want to be REAL. I WILL fail, and things may not always go the way I dream them to go, but that’s ok. With Christ helping me every step of my days, I will learn to be more content, yet still grow and develop in a healthy and strong way. A change in the way of thinking like this, can only be successfully accomplished through Him.
“….. for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus….” Romans 3:23-24
“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13
Cottage Pie Recipe
So, I cooked cottage pie tonight, and not only was it delicious, but filling too…. AND low in weight watchers propoints too! Bonus! It started off as like the Aldi cookbook recipe, but I changed it a bit.
Here is how to make it…
Heat a small amount of oil in a frypan, and fry up 2 grated carrots, 1 chopped onion and a handful of chopped up beans.
Add 500g of premium low fat mince, cook until well browned.
Tip out excess fat.
Add 500g pasta sauce and chopped parsley (I used fresh parsley from my garden!). Simmer.
While that’s simmering, boil up some chopped potatoes. I used 650g.
When meat is cooked, pop it into a large ovenproof bowl or dish, set aside.
When potatoes are cooked, mash them up with 90g grated lite cheese, and 1/2 cup light milk.
Pop potato mix on top of meat.
Cook in a moderate oven for about 15-20 mins.
Enjoy!
Using the quantities I used, it was 7PP for a serve, with the whole amount serving 6.
Let me know if you try this recipe, and what you thought of it.
Moving The Goal Post
So, it was weigh in day today. I did.not.want.to.go!
I knew I had gained, but more than that I have been feeling very blergh about the whole weight loss thing for ages.
I have tried to regain my focus so many time in so many ways. I started by rejoining meetings, and that did help a bit, but I was still lost.
I set mini goals, got into doing the 1000 steps, tried filling and healthy no tracking days, tried being very public about it all here on my blog and Facebook, tried tracking meticulously….. nothing was sticking though, I had just lost my mojo. I wondered if I would ever get it back and get back to goal.
Hence why i didn’t feel like going today, I wanted to give it all up. 18 months is a long time to be slogging away at something and not being at the end of the line yet, when you thought it would take less than a year!
I even tried to make a hairdresser appointment for this morning so I would have an excuse not to go, but I couldn’t get the appointment, so in the end, I MADE myself go.
It was just what I needed! The meeting topic was just what I needed to hear, and was applicable to me and what I am going through.
Then after the meeting, I sat down with my gorgeous leader and had a little chat with her about how I am feeling. She totally understood me, it was so nice to have someone understand. My two best friends at the meeting totally got me too. That’s why I love meetings, people TRULY understand what I am going through because there are either going through it too, or have done in the past.
My leader got out my notes and checked it all. She said, “so your height is 161cm?” Me… “Ummm…. no I am 166cm” My leader…. “Ok, lets check it.” It came up as 167cm! I am taller than I thought!
What this means is that my healthy weight range needed to be adjusted. 6cm taller means that my healthy weight range is higher than what was originally set. So to cut a long story short, my leader and I changed my goal weight to 70kg now instead of the 65kg it was before. So, even thought I gained 900g today, I am now only 6kg away from goal!!! That’s pretty exciting. And that fact alone has given me more inspiration than I have felt in a LONG time! To be only 6kg away from goal weight is amazing, it’s so close I can truly smell it!
I also had some advice from a dear friend at my meeting. She told me that sometimes setting a deadline for goals can be harmful and actually make you lose focus. I set myself a HUGE goal to lose 13kg in 13 weeks for my birthday at the end of March. That is really too much to expect. So, I have decided to just say that my goal is 6kg away, and it will be great when I get there. I would love to lose 500g a week, but as long as I am losing and not gaining I know I will get there, whenever that may be. Even if it’s another 6 months time, I KNOW I will get there! (But I am secretly hoping to get there sooner hehe)
So yeah, I thought I would update on here all this. Oh and for those who like seeing the graph, here is a little graph showing my weight loss since I joined WW in Oct 2010. I joined at 103.2kg and I am now 76.0kg.
My goal for this week is to just lose 100g though. I know, it doesn’t sound like much, but I have my 30th birthday party on Saturday night, and I want to enjoy it. But, even though I am celebrating, I should be able to lose something, even if it’s just 100g I will be happy.
So, the way I am going to do that…. I am going to make sure I stick to my daily 26 points, and I am going to save all my activity and weekly bonus points for Saturday night. I am super busy this week, but plan on wearing my pedometer and trying to get as much incidental activity as possible. On Friday I have booked a walk in with my wise WW friend, and I plan on doing the 1000 steps with Eli on my back on Monday afternoon before school pick up. Hopefully that will be enough to get that 100g (or more) off. I will let you know how I go.
Seaford Catch Up
I am involved in an online group for Australian Child Photograhers, and occasionally we organise a catch up so we can get together in real life and chat photography and take pics of our kids and each others kids at lovely locations. This catch up, we decided to head to the beach and have some fish and chips on the beach, let the kids play and do a bit of shooting while the sun set. It was so so very fun to catch up with some ladies I had met before, and two lovely ladies I hadn’t met before. Plus Izzy came along too, along with one other Dad. Us girls had a fab time chatting away while the dad’s did an awesome job of looking after the kids in the water.
Here is a collection of both mine and Izzy’s shots from the night. We kept stealing the camera off each other all evening. I really need to buy Izzy a new camera!
